For most Conservative Jews, interaction with non-Jews is an accepted way of life. While many Orthodox Jews live near their synagogues and send their children to Jewish day schools or yeshivot, this is far less common in the Conservative Jewish community. Conservative Jewish families often live in suburbs, spread out, away from their synagogues. In large measure their children go to public schools and afternoon Hebrew School. They may participate in a youth group, but their core group of friends is often made up of the ones they see every day, who are not necessarily Jewish.

The same was true for me. Judaism was always, and continues to be, very important to me and my family. Still, growing up, my close friends were not Jewish. I attended Hebrew School regularly, participated in youth group activities and went to synagogue almost every week. But I also played in Little League and was active in Girl Scouts, where most if not all of my friends were non-Jewish. This was never a problem, just the way it was. I even liked that the community I lived in was so diverse-- African Americans, Caucasians, Jews, Christians, etc.

As I got older and became more observant in my Jewish practice, I tried to find a tighter, closer Jewish community. I continued to be active in USY and I began to go to Camp Ramah. As close as I was with my non-Jewish friends, nothing compared to being in a community which shared my fundamental beliefs on my religion and its practices. I continued to hang out with my non-Jewish friends, but my increase in observance began to create some problems. I could no longer do everything they wanted to do. We couldn’t go out to eat or to the movies on a Friday night.

When I began looking at colleges, one of my criteria was that there be Jews. I looked for schools with Hillels as well as the academic field I wanted to study. After visiting, I thought I’d found the perfect school for both. North Carolina State University was ranked for the Animal Science field and had a Hillel with 200 students! Growing up with so few Jews around, I thought this was a lot.

I had culture shock when I moved from Buffalo, NY. I was living in the South, in the midst of the Baptist Bible Belt. I realized soon enough that 200 Jews was not very much compared to 27,000 students total at the school. Even more so, 200 was the number on paper, but far fewer ever showed up to any programs — and these were few and far between. The highlight of my Jewish practice while there was spending almost every Shabbat away from my friends and dorm at the house of my Hillel Director and her family, which was great. For many of the students living in my dorm, who quickly became my friends, I was the first Jew they’d met and they were quite curious. I never had a negative experience with them. Many of us came from different places and practiced different religions and this often led to wonderful conversations and great learning experiences. Many of us shared a belief in God, prayed on the Sabbath and some even said a grace before meals!

After that year, I chose to transfer to SUNY Binghamton, which had more Jews who were observant and where I would be able to grow in my Jewish experiences and observances as well. Still, I wouldn’t change spending that year at NC State for anything. Out of college, I now work for a Jewish organization in a building with other Jewish organizations in a city with many observant Jews. I haven’t yet met any non-Jews here to become friends with, because I don’t really interact with them…and I miss it. I’m glad I didn’t go to Jewish day school my entire life, glad I was able to grow up knowing and being friends with many non-Jews, with whom I had and still have many things in common and from whom I still learn a great deal. There’s strength in diversity!