Who, What, When, Where, How is God?

By Maya Berezovsky
KOACH on Campus Editor

How often do we ponder the relationships between ourselves and God? Many of us recite prayers praising God. Some mutter personal prayers from home. But beyond that, how certain are we of the factors of our relationship with God?

I was the Talmud Torah student who loved to ask stumping questions. My favorite question, the one I asked year after year to a new teacher in front of a fresh crowd:

If God spoke a few times to the characters in the Torah, and they heard God clearly, why hasn’t anyone heard God speak since then and why didn’t they tell us how God sounded?

The teachers always responded that we do interact with God, even if we do not hear God’s voice, and it is likely that the biblical characters did not hear God like one may hear a person, but communicated with nature.

I decided to stop asking the question, despite receiving affirming nods from my classmates and hearing, "Good question!" from across the room. The answer dissatisfied me, but I don’t blame the teachers. We don’t know. We can’t know. Stop asking, Maya. Give it up. I can’t.

I want to understand. What does God look like? Does God have a brain? What material is God made of? Should I feel sacriligious asking these questions? Does God have a voice? What does God do when God is resting? How can God rest? Does that mean God’s not watching while God’s resting? How much control does God have over us? How does God show disapproval? What exactly does God want? Most importantly, if I doubt God, does God get upset and target bad things at me?

I feel like a lost child when I really think about how much I don’t know. But nobody knows. Still, I pray to this God I can’t picture and can’t hear. I ask for help from this God whom I’ve never met. Good things happen and I praise God. Bad things happen and I ask God for help. Who am I praising? Who is hearing my pleas?

For a few years, I figured God sits in front of a gigantic control board pushing red buttons day and night controlling the world. I knew it was silly, but it calmed my need to know. I’m too old for that now. Now I want an adult explanation that is concrete and verifiable. I want what I can’t have.

Perhaps we never think about the relationship between us and God because our belief is so strong there is no point speculating. But maybe we don’t ponder for fear we’ll be uncomfortable with our own beliefs. A teacher told me one reason Christianity is so popular is because Christians can see an image of their God. They can wear him around their neck or hang him on the wall. In Judaism we can’t see an image of our God; it’s against the rules. Some think this makes Judaism less believable. Others believe Judaism is more beautiful as a result. Some realists are irritated. Others’ beliefs are strengthened.

We’ll never receive a personality profile on God. For the people who struggle with believing without seeing, taking another’s word for it, how should we settle this issue? I pose these unanswerable questions not to frustrate you, but to make you wonder and make your own decisions. Does it matter for people to have an image of who God is? Do not ignore the topic to avoid aggravation. Explore the topic to better understand your own view of yourself, the world, Judaism, and how all three intersect.

[Posted 5/25/06]